Are we all perhaps linked by invisible bonds? Do the actions of one affect others, even if those others are far away? Our lives and the universe itself may be all part of a single mechanism in which all creatures and events are 'entangled' with one another.

Thursday, October 13, 2005

What A Day!

Woke up this morning, felt something wet on my face, thought I had been drooling in my sleep (ewww) but after turning on the light saw that my nose was bleeding! Which kind of freaked me out 'cause I've only had my nose bleed maybe twice before in my life...what was I doing...fighting in my sleep? Took a quick shower & shaved (which I usually do at night, but was so tired Tuesday evening I didn't bother), had a small bowl of cereal and headed out to catch the bus to work. It's raining out, yet again, the bus finally pulls up, the driver opens the door, then as I'm about to get on, he tells me "oh,I'm not picking up anyone-just dropping off". As usual, the bus is full of kids on their way to the high school a few blocks up the street, but there was room enough for me to squeeze on. Anyway, I get off, the bus sits there for about 2 minutes while someone tries to exit through the rear door. The rear door doesn't seem to be working, and the person looking to exit I guess doesn't want to fight their way to the front of the bus through the crowd. Finally the bus pulls off, the person never having gotten off, and I wait for the next one. It comes along a few minutes later, looks like it not going to stop, but then does, as I get on I see the driver has a BIG cup of coffee up to her face, while driving with one hand. I don't think she even saw me standing there at first 'cause that cup was blocking her view.

Work as usual was hectic--I'm used to that but for some reason I felt really down today. I don't like to talk about my feelings, but I had moments today when I felt like a wave of sadness pass over me. Not trying to be dramatic, but lately I have had that happen more than once. Don't know if it's because I haven't been eating or sleeping as much as I should, because I'm fast approaching the big 50th birthday (mid-life crisis perhaps), or just because the emotions I've keep bottled up for so long are finally trying to escape (like a genie trapped in a magic lamp), or maybe I'm just losing my mind (a small loss, I'm sure).

Then tonight I was trying to help a new blog friend with his links (they weren't working properly) and I think I screwed up. I suggested he look at someone's else's blog source code and he copied some links from there to his to see if that would work. It did, but then my new friend got an angry message demanding he take them down. Now I meant no harm and neither did he, and I want to publicly apologize to the parties involved. I'm not mentioning any names on purpose because I don't want to cause any further damage. I will say the other people involved are two guys who I met soon after I got on the internet and they mean a GREAT deal to me. Sorry if I unintentionally caused any problem--no harm was intended.

While I was helping this friend out with his blog, I was IM'ed by another good friend who was really worried that he might get in trouble because earlier he had made a few sexual comments to a woman in a chat room and she threatened to turn him in. Of course he meant no harm and even apologized to her, but he was worried because he is a student here in the U.S. from a foreign country and wasn't sure what might happen. I told him I thought nothing would come of it--after all half the internet is full of sex. And it's not like he was stalking her, he just made a few comments--what's the big deal? By the way, this is a friend I come out to this past summer during an IM chat--he was surprised, to say the least, but cool about it.

What's really strange about all this is I never get phone calls, rarely chat with anyone online and spend most of my free time alone goofing around on this stupid computer. Wait, I better not insult my computer like that--I meant to say "stupendous" computer. (It's been acting a bit odd lately and I don't want to make it angry at me-shhh) Now all of a sudden, I'm helping people and offering advice...has the world gone completely insane, or is it just me? Maybe this day is this a dream and I'll wake up soon.

Speaking of waking up, I'd better get to bed as it's very late and I should have been asleep about 3 hours ago, that's assuming I'm not just dreaming this whole thing. Just hope I don't get into any more "dream-fights" and end up with a bloody nose again!

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